Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize