She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Randomize
