I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
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