i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I believe in your delicious
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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