i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
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