whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
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