I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
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it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
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There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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