yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
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