GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
When did angry sex become our thing?
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
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