i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
