i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
