when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Randomize
