I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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