Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
No subtext here. People are naked.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
