sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Randomize
