have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
i think i just naturally attract stoners
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
