Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
