I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Randomize
