would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
