I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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