I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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