is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
he wants to bone in the snuggie
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
do nipples grow back?
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