windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
