hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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