That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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