Quick, to the slutcave!
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize
