so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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