She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
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