She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
