you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Is her dick bigger than yours?
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
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