im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Randomize
