how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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