They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Randomize
