I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I love having hate sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
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