Sponge bath it is.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
