is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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