Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
