Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Randomize
