where am i from again
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
