Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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