And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
