Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
i've created a new STD.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Randomize
