I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
