Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
