i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
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