Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
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Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
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