I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
