I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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