The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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