just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Randomize
